Try This: ListenPosted: July 25, 2011
This week’s Try This is deceptively simple: Listen.
Along with Four Minutes in the Morning, developing a habit of really listening to your beloved on a daily basis has many longterm benefits, especially building trust and intimacy. You’ll need to figure out for yourself what “really” listening means in your relationship, but at a minimum it involves direct eye contact and not multi-tasking. We’ve haven’t always been great at this simple thing in our relationship, which has resulted in some annoyance (mostly on my part) and some humorous entertainment.
While I generally think that humans are more alike than we are different from each other, and that men and women are spread across a spectrum of gendered behaviors, I do think there are some communication styles that tend to be clustered in men or women. In general, women want connection and to feel heard, while men want to solve problems and have agency in the world. This may not be the case in your particular relationship, but it’s worth articulating for yourselves.
The entrepreneurial partner will benefit just as much, if not more, when his or her turn comes to be listened to. Your beloved can be (ideally should be) the most trusted person in your life. When it’s time to talk through pivotal business decisions, or vent about an annoying employee / partner / investor / customer, or just tell someone what you’re really thinking or feeling (scared, tired, elated), you’ll have a strong habit of communicating and knowing that there’s a person in your life who will always listen to you.